A Time to Gather (Bruce Feiler)

 

A while ago I decided I needed to re-read more often. Each month I pick a book that is worth re-reading. This month I was to re-read The Ritual Effect, but this book came up in my e-book holds at the library so I decided to read it instead. It was well-worth it and a good companion to The Ritual Effect. 

I really like this author. I put a couple more of his books on hold.

The first few chapters were about rituals we go through in life: birth rituals, entering adulthood, marriage, divorce...and of course, death. I read the death chapter while at my Auntie Shirley's building. I was waiting for her to arrive back at the senior's home from the hospital. I went down to the chapel where it was quiet and read there. They had a table set up with pictures of people who had passed away over the past six months (or maybe it was a year. I can't recall). Anyway, it was a weird mash up of coincidences to be reading about death outside a Catholic chapel with pictures and birth and death dates of all the people from that home. 

Notes:

- p. 229 Rituals are a means of collective time travel. And there's no better place to begin those trips than from our original home: nature.

- p. 250 When times are easy and there's plenty to go around, individuals can go it alone. But when conditions are harsh and life is tenuous, it takes a team sworn to reciprocity to keep life going forward (actually from Braiding Sweetgrass).

p. 260 What distinguishes ritual from routine and habit:

• Rituals are intentional, symbolic, elevated actions
• Routines are intentional, repeated actions.
• Habits are automatic, repeated actions

Chapter 12 was called The Garden of Lost Children all about rituals around pregnancy loss - miscarriage, stillborn births, death of children and even abortions. He had a lot of information about stillborn children - which of course, really touched me. I had a stillborn baby in 2007. She would be 19 this year! 

• p. 335 Apparently, King Tut (Tutankhamen) was buried with two stillborn baby girls. ...largely because Carter kept it secret. p. 338 In 1978, the two mummies were x-rayed and discovered to be stillborn girls who had died at twenty-four and thirty-six weeks. They had congenital abnormalities related to spina bifida that are consistent with inbreeding - Tutankhamen's parents were biological siblings, which explains his twisted spine, elongated skull, and club foot; his wife was his half sister. In 2001, The British medical historian Geoffrey Chamberlain argued that the mummies were identical girls who suffered from twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome - the same condition the author and his wife and been warned about - which led to their premature deaths.

• p. 338 I met a woman who every year on the anniversary of her abortion would make a meal that her child would have liked at that age - in the early years it was juice boxes and candy necklaces, in the teenage years it was hamburgers and french fries. She would knit a red cap, place a bib on the statue, and serve a meal. It was an ocean of love.
• p. 340 Irish traditions around baby deaths - they would bury corpses under the roofs of churches, a practice known as eaves-drop burials, so that dripping water might stealthily baptize their unprotected children
• p. 343 Many of the rituals around child death are done in a group. There's so much shame around losing a child. The only medicine strong enough to counter that pain is the bllessings of not being alone.
• p. 344 In the 2000s, scholars released studies showing that parents who see, hold, sniff, dress, kiss, and comfort their stillborn children have better mental health outcomes than those denied the privilege.
• p. 346 As Cheryl Haggard observed (started an organization called Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, a nonprofit that offers free, professional remembrance photos to families that have lost a child), "Some may look at us and think we photograph dead or dying babies, my perspective is: We don't photograph death, we capture love. And the love between a parent and a child can never be broken."
• Chapter 13 is called A Moment of Hope and is all about cleansing rituals (water or oil....if only the author knew about our temples) and renewing rituals (again....this made me think of our temple). It also talked about "potlatches"....a ritual where people give all they have collected to those less fortunate (hello law of consecration?)
• Interesting podcast to check out: Shame Pinata: Creating Rites of Passage for Real-Life Transitions
• p. 383 Rituals connect us; the correct imbalances among us; they celebrate our loftiest moments; they chronicle our deepest aspirations. But mostly they make us feel at home. As Thomas Hovenden captured in another moment of national crises, they replace our grief over broken home ties with a vision of ties that bind.

P. 393 How to design your own rituals: 

• 1. Reverence: Do what makes you feel at home. Identify what you're most missing from home  - whether that's safety, empathy, love, or joy - and design a ritual with that goal in mind
• 2. Context: Identify your tension; define your intention. It must address the underlying uncertainty, fluidity and instability in the group; and provide comfort, relief, and support for that volatility. Ask, "What is our pain point? What is the tension, transition, or turbulence that we're experiencing?" Then, "What intention matches that tension?"
• A = agency (what we do, make, or create; our me story)
• B = belonging (our relationships, friends, loved ones, and colleagues; our we story)
• C = cause (a calling, mission, or purpose, our thee story)
• 3. Options: off-the-shelf or do-it-yourself, big or small, sacred space or third space.
• 4. Pointers: The four somethings (old, new, borrowed, you)
• 5. Instructions: boundaries, stakes, compromise, empathy, hope 
• draw a boundary that defines the sacred space
• articulate the stakes
• compromise-rehearse on something important
• create and atmosphere of empathy
• end with a moment of hope

• p. 400 Rituals work in times of change because they titrate change. They work in times of social upheaval because they modulate social upheaval. They work in times of religious flux because the bridge the religious, the irreligious, the spiritual, and the I'm not religious but I'm spiritual.
• Rituals work because they are acts. They are values lived out loud. As the old adage goes, it's easier to act oneself into a new way of thinking than to think oneself into a new way of acting. A genius of ritual is that it's an old way of acting that leads to a new way of thinking.
• Rituals work because they are shared. Our earliest ancestors shouted, waved sticks, and stamped their feet in unison to signal to predators that they were more powerful together than they were apart; our latest brain researchers have shown that when we sing, dance, eat, or work together, not only do our bodies synchronize, but our feelings do, too. To be in union is to become a union; to be in a group is to become a groupkeeper.
• Rituals work because they are unnecessary. We live in a stranglehold of necessities, with deadening schedules, dulling routines, and draining obligations. Rituals are the unnecessities that unyoke those necessities - they upend schedules, disrupt routines, sideline obligations. They force us to focus on what Keats deemed our "negative capability," the ability to be in "uncertainties, Mysteries, doubts" without reflexively grasping for reason or explanation.
• Finally, rituals work because they are portable, replicable versions or home. "The ache for home lives in all of us," Maya Angelou said, "The safe place where we can go as we are." Today we need that safe space more than ever - for morale making, for meaning making, for memory making.

Goodreads says:

At a time when our shared humanity is under threat and traditional life rituals are losing favor, one of our great decoders of human connection chronicles the astonishing rise of reinvented life rituals around the world and offers a blueprint for restoring togetherness.

It’s easy to be overwhelmed by the sharp decline in the types of life rituals that have been the tentpoles of family and community life since time immemorial. Birth rituals have plummeted, as have comings-of-age. Fewer than half of Americans are married today; only one in three is buried. “It took us ten thousand years to establish cultural norms around how we mark collective life transitions,” writes Bruce Feiler. “It took us fifty years to dismantle them.” We have clearly entered what Feiler calls a “celebration recession.” Can this threat to society be reversed? 

Feiler wanted to find out. As he did with his groundbreaking series Walking the Bible, Feiler went on a round-the-world ritual road trip, attending—and participating in—life rituals in sixteen countries on six continents. These rarely seen spectacles include an adolescent tooth filing in Bali, a mass baptism in the Vatican, and a tribal bride price negotiation in South Africa. He witnessed six weddings in a day in Las Vegas and ten funerals in a week in Ireland.

As he did with Life Is in the Transitions, Feiler also gathered the stories of a hundred ritual designers in twenty-six countries, including a Pentecostal priest in Nigeria who started a fertility circle, the creator of the Purple Pundit Project in New Jersey who leads LGBTQ+ Hindu weddings, and the founder of an app in Canada that helps “create your own rites of passage.”

What Feiler emerged with is a literary achievement, at once a great adventure story in the tradition of Sebastian Junger and Cheryl Strayed; a richly reported sociological portrait in the vein of Robert Putnam and Barbara Ehrenreich; and a conversation-shaping piece of social commentary in the mode of David Brooks and Jonathan Haidt.

Far from a ritual recession, we are in the midst of a  ritual renaissance, one that our outdated radar screens have failed to pick up. Fed up with top-down life rituals, everyday people are reimagining rituals at a pace unseen in human history. From boomers to Gen Z and boosted by social media, this new movement is reviving life rituals for a new century and building thriving communities in the process.

From a master storyteller on the trail of an urgent, untold story, what Feiler has created is a hopeful field guide to modern ritual; a tool kit for infusing collective meaning into our lives; and, perhaps, a framework for repairing our homesick world.

The Other Side of Change (Maya Shankar)

 

This book has a great message. I didn't love the audio (read by the author) but the message was strong. It's all about having the courage and faith to make the best of whatever happens in life. Who doesn't need that message?!

Goodreads says:

"With powerful stories and practical science, Maya examines how we find purpose after adversity and possibility under uncertainty.” —Adam Grant

"A rare combination of beautiful storytelling, cognitive science, and wholehearted wisdom. —Brené Brown

INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER

A revelatory exploration of how we can find meaning in the tumult of change, from a renowned cognitive scientist and host of the critically acclaimed podcast A Slight Change of Plans

Life has a way of thwarting our best-laid plans. Out of nowhere, we’re confronting the end of a relationship, an unexpected diagnosis, the loss of a job, or some other twist of fate. In these moments, it can feel like we’re free-falling into the unknown.

As a cognitive scientist, Maya Shankar has spent decades studying the human mind. When an unwanted change in her own life left her reeling, she sought out people who had navigated major disruptions. In The Other Side of Change, Shankar tells their riveting, singular stories and weaves in scientific insights to illuminate universal lessons hidden within them. The result is a rich portrait of our complex reactions to change and a deep well of wisdom we can draw from during these experiences.

Shankar invites us to rethink our relationship with change altogether. When a big change happens to us, it can lead to profound change within us. The unique stresses and demands of being thrust into a new reality can lead us to uncover new abilities, perspectives, and values, transforming us in extraordinary ways. What if we saw moments of upheaval as an opportunity to reimagine who we can be, rather than as something to just endure? What potential could we unlock within ourselves?

Whether you're processing a past change, grappling with a present one, or bracing for a future one, this book is a wise and thought-provoking companion to help you discover who you can become on the other side of change.

How To Be A Positive Leader (Jane E Dutton Gretchen M Spreitzer)

 

There are actually many many authors of this book:

Oana Branzei
Kim Cameron
Jane E Dutton
Karen Golden-Biddle
Adam M Grant
Erika Hayes James
Shirli Kopelman
Ramaswami Mahalingam
David M Mayer
Christine Porath
Robert E Quinn
Gretchen Preitzer
Laura Morgan Roberts
Scott Soneshein
Anjan V Thakor
Lynn Perry Wooten
Amy Wrzesniewski

They authors are  all PhDs and leaders in business and leadership research.  The forward is by Shawn Anchor, who is well known for writing The Happiness Advantage and Before Happiness

They're all really great and wise people!! I can see that this could be a group book study to do over a year and work on implementing many of their suggestions. I can see how the organization I work for has many of these things in place. There are things I could do though to make my work life better. I decided first to focus on high quality connections. I'm tracking my efforts each day in May.

Table of Contents:

1. Foster Positive Relationships

    1. Build High-Quality Connections
    2. Outsource Inspiration
    3. Negotiate Mindfully

II. Unlock Resources From Within
    4. Enable Thriving at Work
    5. Cultivate Positive Identifies
    6. Engage in Job Crafting

III. Tap Into The Good

    7. Activate Virtuousness
    8. Lead an Ethical Organization
    9. Imbue the Organization with a Higher Purpose

IV. Create Resourceful Change

    10. Cultivate Hope: Found, Not Lost
    11. Create Micro-moves for Organizational Changes
    12. Treat Employees as Resources, Not Resisters
    13. Create Opportunity From Crisis

Goodreads says:

Positive leaders are able to dramatically expand their people’s—and their own—capacity for excellence. And they accomplish this without enormous expenditures or huge heroic gestures. Here leading scholars—including Adam Grant, author of the bestselling Give and Take ; positive organizational scholarship movement cofounders Kim Cameron and Robert Quinn; and thirteen more—describe how this is being done at companies such as Wells Fargo, Ford, Kelly Services, Burt’s Bees, Connecticut’s Griffin Hospital, the Michigan-based Zingerman’s Community of Businesses, and many others. They show that, like the butterfly in Brazil whose flapping wings create a typhoon in Texas, you can create profound positive change in your organization through simple actions and attitude shifts.

Forged By Reading (Beers and Probst)

 

I am a big fan of these two authors and have read a number of their books. This one spoke to my heart. The bottom line is that reading is what makes our world a better place and it should do something TO us. What happens in your head? What happens in your heart? And what will you do after reading what you've read?  (This is part of their BHH approach - only now they've added a D at the end for what are you going to DO) It's all about the power of a literate life. They're singing my song! 

Goodreads says:

Bestselling authors Kylene Beers and Robert E. Probst expand the vision of what it means to be an independent reader in our schools and in our nation by challenging our concepts of literacy. In an educational climate dictated by standards, tests, and mandates, Beers and Probst offer a needed vision of the interrelated nature of literacy and democracy, while they inspire us to do the hard work. Divided into three parts―Change, Power, and Hope―each section of the book helps us reenvision a world where all experience the power of a literate life.

Is Was (Deborah Freedman)

 

This is beautiful. I also loved This House, Once. The simplicity of this book would be a great conversation starter in a classroom. 

Goodreads says:

Explore the connections found in nature in this simply stunning picture book that explores the idea of change, both big and small.

This sky is
the same sky that was blue,
and now is
spilling down in drips and drops…
until rainclouds pass…

Over the course of one day, a small child experiences the way the natural world changes from sun to rain and from day to night as things transform from is to was in this breathtaking book.

Bertha Takes a Drive (Jan Adkins)

 

I love stories that teach us about history and how we sometimes are slow to accept change. People thought Bertha's car was ridiculous, dangerous and a threat. I loved how she knew all the ins and outs of the engine as well as the brakes. This was a resourceful woman! 

We read this on Epic.

Goodreads says:

In this nonfiction joyride, Bertha Benz and her sons drive across Germany in the world's first automobile.

It's 1888 and Bertha Benz's husband, Karl, has invented the prototype Benz motorwagen. But the German government declares the vehicle illegal, and the church calls it the devil's work. Unbeknownst to her husband, Bertha steals away with her two sons and drives nearly one hundred miles to prove just how amazing the motorwagen is. Bertha's mechanical savvy gets the boys to Grandma's house safely, and the remarkable mother/son road trip reduces global concern about moving vehicles. 

50 Ways to Soothe Yourself Without Food (Susan Albers)

I am an emotional eater and am trying to change that about myself. If you can't find a way to distract a food obsession by reading this book, there's no hope! LOL Lots of ideas! This is a good book to figure out what works for you - if you really know yourself.

I think I'm on the right track with mindfulness and meditation. I will keep working on that!

Goodreads says:

Food has the power to temporarily alleviate stress and sadness, enhance joy, and bring us comfort when we need it most. It's no wonder experts estimate that 75 percent of overeating is triggered by our emotions, not physical hunger. The good news is you can instead soothe yourself through dozens of mindful activities that are healthy for both body and mind.

Susan Albers, author of Eating Mindfully, now offers 50 Ways to Soothe Yourself Without Food, a collection of mindfulness skills and practices for relaxing the body in times of stress and ending your dependence on eating as a means of coping with difficult emotions. You'll not only discover easy ways to soothe urges to overeat, you'll also learn how to differentiate emotion-driven hunger from healthy hunger. Reach for this book instead of the refrigerator next time you feel the urge to snack-these alternatives are just as satisfying!

Power From On High (Caldwell)

The title of this book was a draw for me. The more I read the more 'meh' I felt about it. I don't feel obligated to finish books I don't like, and I did end up finishing it, so that says something. However, it wasn't any different than anything I have heard at a long and dull stake conference or sacrament meeting where people rehash a talk that has already been given by someone else.

Goodreads says:

When the Lord's church was organized in this dispensation, the Savior . . . gave Joseph Smith power from on high that he might fulfill the Lord's purposes and accomplish His marvelous work. Just as Joseph Smith needed power from heavenly sources, so also are we dependent upon that same power in order to fulfill the Lord's expectations of us, be accepted of Him, and be welcomed back into His presence. In the pages of this inspiring text, Elder C. Max Caldwell, emeritus member of the First Quorum of the Seventy, explains that we don't have the power to personally overcome and transcend our mortal limitations. However, the redeeming power of the Savior not only saves us from permanent physical disabilities through the resurrection, but also repairs internal spiritual damages incurred when we fail to follow the narrow path leading home. Elder Caldwell then points us toward principles and practices that will connect us to the Lord's power plant—simple guidelines that will give us the power to overcome temptation and keep our lives focused on the Savior and the saving principles of His gospel. Filled with scriptural affirmations, powerful examples, meaningful quotes from General Authorities, and the author's tender and insightful personal experiences, this is truly a book to be savored, treasured, and referenced often.

The Stranger (Chris Van Allsburg)

We are in love with Chris Van Allsburg books in my class. This one is a great mystery. Who is this stranger? When I first read it, I had no idea that he was Jack Frost. There are a number of clues all through it though.  I found a great guide from Houghton Mifflin to help with a lesson on inferencing as well. We will do the work in our Reading Notebooks.We read it again and students wrote down the clues they noticed. At lunch time I showed them a video of Jack Frost. We'll see if anyone makes the connection. So far they say he is a "winter fairy". Close!


Goodreads says:

The enigmatic origins of the stranger that Farmer Bailey hits with his truck and brings home to recuperate seem to have a mysterious relation to the weather. Could he be Jack Frost?

Stella Diaz Has Something To Say (Angela Dominguez)

This will be a great book for Grade 3 Book Club. The lessons are quite overt and easy to find, which is a great way for children to learn to discover the theme in a story. We could practice it as a class. This is also the Global Read Aloud book for this year. I am tossing around the idea of connecting with another class and also reading it aloud.  It was also a quick work to find Notice and Note Signposts.

Goodreads says:

In her first middle-grade novel, award-winning picture book author and illustrator Angela Dominguez tells a heartwarming story based on her own experiences growing up Mexican-American.

Stella Diaz loves marine animals, especially her betta fish, Pancho. But Stella Diaz is not a betta fish. Betta fish like to be alone, while Stella loves spending time with her mom and brother and her best friend Jenny. Trouble is, Jenny is in another class this year, and Stella feels very lonely.

When a new boy arrives in Stella's class, she really wants to be his friend, but sometimes Stella accidentally speaks Spanish instead of English and pronounces words wrong, which makes her turn roja. Plus, she has to speak in front of her whole class for a big presentation at school! But she better get over her fears soon, because Stella Díaz has something to say!

Stella Díaz Has Something to Say introduces an infectiously charming new character with relatable writing and adorable black-and-white art throughout. Simple Spanish vocabulary is also integrated within the text, providing a bilingual element.

Tuck Everlasting (Natalie Babbitt)

It's been a while since I've read this book. I still love it. I think I've read it more than two times - but it might have been before I started tracking on GoodReads. I read it again this year with my class...and I cried. This group has been an interesting group. Usually, my class tires of me reading it aloud and asks if they can read some of it on their own. These guys are perfectly happy to have me read and so I read the ENTIRE thing aloud. Maybe that's why it touched me a little more. I did my very best to read with good expression. LOL It's full of drama!

p 62 (chapter 12) Tuck to Winnie, on the pond in a fishing boat: ....Everything's a wheel, turning and turning, never stopping. The frog is part of it, and the bugs, and the fish, and the wood thrush, too. And people. But never the same ones. Always coming in new, always growing and changing, and always moving on. That's the way it's supposed to be. That's the way it is."

p 63: That's what us tuck are, Winnie. Stuck so's we can't move on. We ain't part of the wheel no more. Dropped off, Winnie. Left behind. And everywhere around us, things is moving and growing and changing. You, for instance. A child now, but someday a woman. And after that, moving on to make room for the new children."

"....dying's part of the wheel, right there next to being born. You can't pick out the pieces you like and leave the rest. Being part of teh whole thing, that's the blessing. But it's passing us by, us Tucks. Living's heavy work, but off to one side, the way we are, it's useless, too. It don't make sense. If I knows how to climb back on the wheel, I'd do it in a minute. You can't have living without dying. So you can't call it living, what we got. We just are, we just be, like rocks beside the road."

Goodreads says:

Doomed to - or blessed with - eternal life after drinking from a magic spring, the Tuck family wanders about trying to live as inconspicuously and comfortably as they can. When ten-year-old Winnie Foster stumbles on their secret, the Tucks take her home and explain why living forever at one age is less a blessing that it might seem. Complications arise when Winnie is followed by a stranger who wants to market the spring water for a fortune. 

Outer Order, Inner Calm (Gretchen Rubin)

I'm a big Gretchen Rubin fan. I've read The Happiness Project, The Four Tendencies and Better Than Before  (which I try to re-read about every six months). Since I enjoyed all of those so much, I pre-ordered this and was happy to get it as soon as it came out. I think it's definitely one to re-visit annually.

This one is different than the others. It's a quick read with a really narrow focus: lots of tips for organizing. One thing I love about Gretchen Rubin is that she doesn't get stuck on one way to do things. I read The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up and didn't love it because she was too prescriptive with one right way to de-clutter and organize. Gretchen Rubin recognizes that there are a lot of good ways to accomplish the same thing. I especially connected with the section on the importance of the words we use (instead of apologizing for being late, thank people for waiting....instead of mindlessly wandering, explore and so on). She had some good tips. I read it while we were driving on a family trip and found myself anxiously looking forward to getting home to implement some of the strategies.



Goodreads says:

Bestselling author of The Four Tendencies and The Happiness Project Gretchen Rubin illuminates one of her key realizations about happiness: For most of us, outer order contributes to inner calm. In a new book packed with more than one hundred concrete ideas, she helps us create the order and organization that can make our lives happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative. 

In the context of a happy life, a messy desk or crowded coat closet is a trivial problem–yet Gretchen Rubin has found that getting control of the stuff of life makes us feel more in control of our lives generally. By getting rid of things we don’t use, don’t need, or don’t love, as well as things that don’t work, don’t fit, or don’t suit, we free our mind (and our shelves) for what we truly value. 

In this trim book filled with insights, strategies, and sometimes surprising tips, Gretchen tackles the key challenges of creating outer order, by explaining how to “Make Choices,” “Create Order,” “Know Yourself–and Others,” “Cultivate Helpful Habits,” and, of course, “Add Beauty.” 

When we get our possessions under control, we feel both calmer and more energetic. With a sense of humor, and also a clear sense of what’s realistic for most people, Gretchen suggests dozens of manageable steps for creating a more serene, orderly environment–one that helps us to create the lives we yearn for.

The Bad Seed (Jory John)

Jory John is hilarious. This bad seed was probably friends with Dragon.

I have to teach a lesson on Sunday about why it's important to obey. This will be a hilarious addition to the lesson.

The bad seed is a sunflower seed. He doesn't mean to be bad. Things just happen.

Another angle on the story could also be about bullying. Sometimes kids perceive other kids that don't do what we expect as bullies or mean kids. This is a good example of how sometimes people do things and act in ways we don't expect because of the experiences they have had.

Good book for the Notice and Note Signpost of contrasts and contradictions. Just when we think we have this bad seed figured out, he decides to turn over a new leaf. 

Goodreads says:

A humorous picture book about a bad guy who makes an important and life-changing realization.

Pride: The Story of Harvey Milk and the Rainbow Flag (Sanders)

This is a good historical book about how the pride flag came to be. It isn't a topic that comes up in my classroom very often, but I have seen attitudes change over time and can imagine that in time it will become a matter of fact topic. For now, it's one I don't tread into very often just because I'm afraid of the blacklash from parents. If it does though, this is one well worth having, for sure.


Goodreads says:

The very first picture book about the remarkable and inspiring story of the Gay Pride Flag!

In this deeply moving and empowering true story, young readers will trace the life of the Gay Pride Flag, from its beginnings in 1978 with social activist Harvey Milk and designer Gilbert Baker to its spanning of the globe and its role in today’s world. Award-winning author Rob Sanders’s stirring text, and acclaimed illustrator Steven Salerno’s evocative images, combine to tell this remarkable - and undertold - story. A story of love, hope, equality, and pride.

The Four Tendencies (Gretchen Rubin)

I'm really enjoying Gretchen Rubin's books. I'm starting to realize I don't have to fit in other people's pigeon holes. Learning more about myself and what works best for me is liberating! It also helps me understand relationships I have. I have close family who are definitely obligers. They do things and then complain about having to do them. I have never understood why they do things and then feel so put upon.....just don't do it! I understand now that they are obligers. I've learned that I'm an upholder/questioner. I especially appreciated her chapters about how to get along with different profiles of the tendencies. Brilliant read!

I would love a book on tendencies focused on children.


Goodreads says:
In this groundbreaking analysis of personality type, bestselling author of Better Than Before and The Happiness Project, Gretchen Rubin reveals the one simple question that will transform what you do at home, at work, and in life.

During her multibook investigation into understanding human nature, Gretchen Rubin realized that by asking the seemingly dry question "How do I respond to expectations?" we gain explosive self-knowledge. She discovered that based on their answer, people fit into Four Tendencies: Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, and Rebels. Our Tendency shapes every aspect of our behavior, so using this framework allows us to make better decisions, meet deadlines, suffer less stress, and engage more effectively.

More than 600,000 people have taken her online quiz, and managers, doctors, teachers, spouses, and parents already use the framework to help people make significant, lasting change.

The Four Tendencies hold practical answers if you've ever thought...

· People can rely on me, but I can't rely on myself.
· How can I help someone to follow good advice?
· People say I ask too many questions.
· How do I work with someone who refuses to do what I ask or who keeps telling me what to do?

With sharp insight, compelling research, and hilarious examples, The Four Tendencies will help you get happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative. It's far easier to succeed when you know what works for you. 

Crickwing (Janell Cannon)

I love these books by Janell Cannon! Verdi and Stellaluna are both beautiful books.

The vocabulary in the books is quite challenging - but it works.

Goodreads says:



Artistic flair and the spirit of cooperation save the day!
Crickwing never set out to be a bully. All he wants is to create his art in peace. But it's not easy being different--a cockroach with a cricked wing and a flair for sculpture is a ready target for the bigger creatures in the forest. Crickwing just wants to even the score, and leafcutter ants are so easy to pick on. ...
Big mistake. INobody/I angers the leafcutter queen and gets away with it.
In this epic adventure beneath the foliage, Crickwing and the leafcutter ants go head-to-head. Then a swarm of ferocious army ants threatens, and suddenly everyone is in danger. Crickwing has to do something, but what? He's an artist, not a fighter. What the leafcutters need is a hero. Or, maybe, a cockroach with a really clever idea...
About the Author: Janell Cannon's picture books have won many awards and are beloved around the world. Before she became a full-time creator of books for children, she designed and produced summer reading programs at her local public library. Born and raised in Minnesota, Ms. Cannon now lives in Southern California. 

Slim for Life (Jillian Michaels)

I listened to the audio book. Jillian Michaels is hilarious. I love how real she is.

This is a great book. It is one that I should buy a copy of because it is one to read every six months and to get a plan for new habits to add to healthy living. This book is full of great ideas. I like that she doesn't expect you to wipe out any food groups or take any weird pills or starve. Bonus!

New habits I will incorporate:
1. Always have a plan
2. Carry healthy snacks
3. Eat every four hours

Goodreads says:

Stop battling your weight and slim down for life with this no-nonsense, insider's plan from America's health, wellness, and weight-loss guru: Jillian Michaels. She has helped millions lose weight and feel great, and now she can help you, too.

Bestselling author and Biggest Loser trainer Jillian Michaels swore she'd never write another diet book. But she realized that with all of the conflicting, overly complicated information being thrown at you each day, what you need is a clear, simple plan that cuts through all the confusion to deliver amazing results, fast. This book distills all she's learned about diet, fitness, and a healthy lifestyle to provide anyone seeking to be slim, strong, and healthy with an easier path to achieving dramatic body transformation.

No nonsense, no gimmicks, just actionable advice that gets incredible results fast!

Healthy Brain, Healthy Life (Wendy Suzuki)

I'm fascinated at how exercise is such a big part of every brain book I read. It makes all the difference. I can testify to that! I loved her research on how exercise helps with creativity, problem solving, mood and more. It made me want to recommit to getting my students to move more. I also think that when the school day ends, I should go for a walk around the block and think about what went great and what I need to follow up on the next day before I sit down. Perhaps I'd be more productive if I did. Her stories of voicing intentions while exercising made a lot of sense. I have read recently how important it is to use all the senses to increase memory - see it, read it, write it, say it. This fits well with what she talked about.

I really enjoyed the mix of science and personal experiences in this book. It made it much more relate-able than just straight science research.

This book made me want to work on adding meditation to my life.

I listened to this as an audio book and I have to admit I found the voice a little irritating. It was a little too bouncy and chipper (which I feel silly saying...but it's true). I liked the brain hacks (ways to implement the topics of the chapter) at the end of each chapter.


Goodreads says:

Dr. Wendy Suzuki one day woke up and realized she didn’t have a life. As an almost-40-year-old award-winning college professor, world-renowned neuroscientist, she had—what many considered—everything: tenure as a professor at New York University; her own very successful neuroscience research lab; prizes for scientific discoveries on cognition and memory; articles published in prestigious scientific journals. As a woman and a scientist, she was the envy of her peers and lauded by her superiors. On paper, she had a stellar career and an impeccable record. 

What could she possibly be missing? Everything else. 

Suzuki was overweight. She was tired. She was lonely, had strained work relationships, and for the first time in her life, completely without direction. So she resolved to change her life. The first step--get moving. 

Everyone knows that exercise makes you feel better—that when you hit the gym despite the dread, you leave in a better mood. Healthy Brain, Happy Life offers the real science of how exercise effects your mind. 

Using Wendy’s journey from frumpy, fat and frustrated to fit and fabulous as a guide, Healthy Brain offers not just the HOWS of making exercise an important part of life, but the WHYS of the benefits it brings. But movement is just the first step to being Brain Healthy. Once you get your body and mind hooked on exercise, you bring in practices in mindfullness to calm stress and allow your minds to wander to unlock creativity. As your brain begins to change (something called neuroplasticity), the benefits build--you get fitter, improve your memory, increase your ability to work quickly and move from task to task easily. 

Along with Dr. Suzuki’s 4 minute Brain Hacks, Healthy Brain, Happy Life offers a simple program for changing your life, straight from a leading scientist’s personal experience.

What I Know For Sure (Oprah Winfrey)

This book made me think I should write down what I know for sure.

I loved reading this. She is big on take responsibility for your life, make your own happiness and follow your heart. Goodreads says: As a creative force, student of the human heart and soul, and champion of living the life you want, Oprah Winfrey stands alone. Over the years, she has made history with a legendary talk show - the highest-rated program of its kind, launched her own television network, become the nation's only African-American billionaire, and been awarded both an honorary degree by Harvard University and the Presidential Medal of Freedom. From all her experiences, she has gleaned life lessons—which, for fourteen years, she's shared in O, The Oprah Magazine's widely popular "What I Know For Sure" column, a monthly source of inspiration and revelation. Now, for the first time, these thoughtful gems have been revised, updated, and collected in What I Know For Sure, a beautiful cloth bound book with a ribbon marker, packed with insight and revelation from Oprah Winfrey. Organized by theme—joy, resilience, connection, gratitude, possibility, awe, clarity, and power—these essays offer a rare, powerful and intimate glimpse into the heart and mind of one of the world's most extraordinary women—while providing readers a guide to becoming their best selves. Candid, moving, exhilarating, uplifting, and frequently humorous, the words Oprah shares in What I Know For Sure shimmer with the sort of truth that readers will turn to again and again.

Stuck (Oliver Jeffers)

Recently, I listened to a podcast by Gretchen Reuben called Happier. She loves children's literature and encouraged everyone to take some time to read some of this genre. This book is a great example of why adults should read picture books.  When I read this it made me want to sit and think about all the different want the book could be used.  I think it could be a great analogy for many RS or SS lessons. It is a great analogy for habits and problem solving. It would also be fun to hear what kids think the lesson in this book is.

I often read other people's comments on Goodreads about curious books like this. I especially loved this: 

Strangely the day after reading I picked up the Guardian and there was an article by Jeffers about the debt he owes to Maurice Sendak (that's why the boy in his first picture books has a stripey jumper, an homage to his favourite monster in Where the Wild Things Are) and also how his books are not children's books, but simply picture books. Because as he says I don't believe they are just for children. I have met countless adults that collect picture books for themselves, and they are growing in confidence about openly admitting this in a book-signing queue. It's not for my daughter, or a friend's nephew. It's for me. Exactly. 

Goodreads says:

From the illustrator of the #1 smash The Day the Crayons Quitcomes another bestseller--a giggle-inducing tale of everything tossed, thrown, and hurled in order to free a kite!

When Floyd's kite gets stuck in a tree, he's determined to get it out. But how? Well, by knocking it down with his shoe, of course. But strangely enough, it too gets stuck. And the only logical course of action . . . is to throw his other shoe. Only now it's stuck! Surely there must be something he can use to get his kite unstuck. An orangutan? A boat? His front door? Yes, yes, and yes. And that's only the beginning. Stuck is Oliver Jeffers' most absurdly funny story since The Incredible Book-Eating Boy. Childlike in concept and vibrantly illustrated as only Oliver Jeffers could, here is a picture book worth rescuing from any tree.