Daring Greatly (Brené Brown)

Reread March 27, 2018

I listened to the audio tape while driving back from Kelowna. Often when I read, I like to make connections to my studies of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I kept thinking, as I was listening, that this all relates to many lessons I have heard and studied about hope. Then, at the end, she talked about the connections to hope. 

This is a great book: well worth re-reading again.

Originally read June 29, 2016

My sister-in-law has talked a lot about this author and then I started noticing her name pop up in all sorts of different places.  The admiration is well deserved. She definitely has some good stuff in this book. It is the kind of book I should read and re-read. I bought this one because I found a book study group that was discussing it over three months. We went to the discussions. It really held me to think a little deeper about the concepts. 

Great quotes:

P. 8 Connection is why we're here. We are hardwired to connect with others, it's what gives purpose an meaning to our lives, and without it there is suffering."

"P. 25 Lynne Twist (The Soul of Money): For me, and for many of us, our first waking thought of the day is "I didn't get enough sleep." The next one us "I don't have enough time." Whether true or not...We spend most of our days.....worrying we don't have enough....this internal scarcity...lives at the very heart of our jealousies, or greed, our greed, our prejudices, and our arguments with life."

P. 53 Trust is a product of vulnerability that grows over time an requires work, attention, and full engagement. Trust isn't a grand gesture-it's a a marble collection.

P. 113 Masks make us feel safer even when they become suffocating. Armour makes us feel stronger even when we grow weary from dragging the weight around. The irony is that when we're standing across from someone who is hidden or shielded by masks and armour, we feel frustrated and disconnected. That's the paradox here: vulnerability is the last thing I want you to see in me, but the first thing I look for in you. 

P. 133 Don't let perfect be the enemy of the good (Cribbed from Voltaire). A twenty minute wake that I do us better than the four-mike run that I don't do. The imperfect book that gets published us better than the perfect book that never leaves my computer. The dinner party of take-out Chinese food is better than the elegant dinner that I never host.

P. 137 There's a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in. - Leonard Cohen

P. 231 ....fitting in and belonging are not the same thing. In fact, fitting in is one of the greatest barriers to belonging. Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be in order to be accepted. Belonging, on the other hand doesn't require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are. 

P. 243 Sometimes the bravest and most important thing you can do us just show up.

Goodreads Summary:

Researcher and thought leader Dr. Brené Brown offers a powerful new vision that encourages us to dare greatly: to embrace vulnerability and imperfection, to live wholeheartedly, and to courageously engage in our lives.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; . . . who at best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” —Theodore Roosevelt

Every day we experience the uncertainty, risks, and emotional exposure that define what it means to be vulnerable, or to dare greatly. Whether the arena is a new relationship, an important meeting, our creative process, or a difficult family conversation, we must find the courage to walk into vulnerability and engage with our whole hearts.

In Daring Greatly, Dr. Brown challenges everything we think we know about vulnerability. Based on twelve years of research, she argues that vulnerability is not weakness, but rather our clearest path to courage, engagement, and meaningful connection. The book that Dr. Brown’s many fans have been waiting for, Daring Greatly will spark a new spirit of truth—and trust—in our organizations, families, schools, and communities. 

The Sworn Virgin (Kristopher Dukes)

I really reveled in the theme of a woman not just falling to societal expectations, but instead doing what she needed to do to not just survive, but to live.

I enjoyed the twists and turns to the story. They definitely kept me reading. I was also taken by the seriousness with which oaths are taken.

On Goodreads the author shared how she came up with the idea for the book.

Years ago, I read an article in The New York Times about the last remaining sworn virgins in the mountains of Albania. Immediately, the basic conflict of "The Sworn Virgin," based on the true tradition, popped into my mind: What happens when you must choose between your love, or your life?

I began researching the culture of the Albanian mountains, learning how traveling into the mountains in 1910, from a Western point of view, was like traveling back thousands of years in time. Understanding the rules of Eleanora's world shaped the context of the characters, and how Eleanora could be true to her time -- but a rebel, as well.



Goodreads says:

What would you do if your father was suddenly and mysteriously murdered, leaving you alone in 1910s Albania?

When 18-year-old Diana’s father is mysteriously shot dead in the cobblestone streets of 1910s Albania, Diana must abandon her dream of studying art in Italy as she struggles to survive in a remote mountain village with her stepmother Mirlinda. 

Nearing starvation, Mirlinda secretly sells Diana into marriage with Edi, the cruel heir of a powerful clan. Rather than lose her freedom, Diana swears to remain a virgin for the rest of her life, a tradition that gives her the right to live as a man: she is now head of her household, can work for a living and carry a gun. She may participate in the vengeful blood feuds that consume the mountain tribes, but she may not be killed—unless she forsakes her vow. 

When an ill stranger stumbles into her life, she nurses him back to health, saving his life but risking her own when she falls in love with him. . .

419 (Will Ferguson)

I really enjoyed this book. It was fun to read a book set in the city I live in! The story is quite compelling. It makes me crazy to hear of people who get sucked into online scams. It was interesting to read the story from all sides. In the end, the women prevail. Only right! :)

Goodreads says:

A car tumbles down a snowy ravine. Accident or suicide?

On the other side of the world, a young woman walks out of a sandstorm in sub-Saharan Africa. In the labyrinth of the Niger Delta, a young boy learns to survive by navigating through the gas flares and oil spills of a ruined landscape. In the seething heat of Lagos City, a criminal cartel scours the internet looking for victims.

Lives intersect, worlds collide, a family falls apart. And it all begins with a single email: “Dear Sir, I am the son of an exiled Nigerian diplomat, and I need your help ...”

419 takes readers behind the scene of the world’s most insidious internet scam. When Laura’s father gets caught up in one such swindle and pays with his life, she is forced to leave the comfort of North America to make a journey deep into the dangerous back streets and alleyways of the Lagos underworld to confront her father’s killer. What she finds there will change her life forever...

IMWAYR

Yesterday I started 419...and I'm half way finished. It's definitely a 'can't put it down' type of book. I also love it because it's set in Calgary.



I finally got this audio book (okay....I should add again....I started it before but didn't finish). It'll be perfect for my drive to Kelowna for Spring Break. Will start it on Saturday.



And, I'm almost finished Once We Were Brothers.



And I just discovered this one on the LDS tools app! I have been listening to it while I'm on the treadmill. Loving it!

She Persisted: 13 American Women Who Changed The World (Chelsea Clinton)

I love this book. I love stories of women. I love the idea of changing the world! Very inspiring.

Goodreads says:

Chelsea Clinton introduces tiny feminists, mini activists and little kids who are ready to take on the world to thirteen inspirational women who never took no for an answer, and who always, inevitably and without fail, persisted.

Throughout American history, there have always been women who have spoken out for what’s right, even when they have to fight to be heard. In early 2017, Senator Elizabeth Warren’s refusal to be silenced in the Senate inspired a spontaneous celebration of women who persevered in the face of adversity. In this book, Chelsea Clinton celebrates thirteen American women who helped shape our country through their tenacity, sometimes through speaking out, sometimes by staying seated, sometimes by captivating an audience. They all certainly persisted.

She Persisted is for everyone who has ever wanted to speak up but has been told to quiet down, for everyone who has ever tried to reach for the stars but was told to sit down, and for everyone who has ever been made to feel unworthy or unimportant or small.

With vivid, compelling art by Alexandra Boiger, this book shows readers that no matter what obstacles may be in their paths, they shouldn’t give up on their dreams. Persistence is power.

This book features: Harriet Tubman, Helen Keller, Clara Lemlich, Nellie Bly, Maria Tallchief, Claudette Colvin, Ruby Bridges, Margaret Chase Smith, Sally Ride, Florence Griffith Joyner, Oprah Winfrey, Sonia Sotomayor—and one special cameo. 

The Case Against Sugar (Gary Taubes)

I have had periods of time where I have not eaten sugar and I have felt a significant difference. The trouble I have had is when I try to have a little bit, I can't seem to stop. I'm not good at moderation, I guess. This book really persuades me that it is worth trying to totally quit eating sugar. I've done a lot of reading about the brain and the effects of exercise. It persuaded me to start an exercise streak...which I'm still on (Day 670 today!). I think I need to start a no sugar streak. I've been trying to figure out a good time to start - when it will be easier. I'm not sure there is an easier time. Sugar is so pervasive!!

So.....Day 1 today!

Goodreads says:

From the best-selling author of Why We Get Fat, a groundbreaking, eye-opening expose that makes the convincing case that sugar is the tobacco of the new millennium: backed by powerful lobbies, entrenched in our lives, and making us very sick.

Among Americans, diabetes is more prevalent today than ever; obesity is at epidemic proportions; nearly 10% of children are thought to have nonalcoholic fatty liver disease. And sugar is at the root of these, and other, critical society-wide, health-related problems. With his signature command of both science and straight talk, Gary Taubes delves into Americans' history with sugar: its uses as a preservative, as an additive in cigarettes, the contemporary overuse of high-fructose corn syrup. He explains what research has shown about our addiction to sweets. He clarifies the arguments against sugar, corrects misconceptions about the relationship between sugar and weight loss; and provides the perspective necessary to make informed decisions about sugar as individuals and as a society.

Fatty Legs (Chisty Jordan-Fenton and Margaret Pokiak-Fenton)

Education is in a bit of a change and we are moving towards a greater expectation to teach issues and history around First Nations so I'm always looking for books that bit the bill. I have had this one on my shelf for a while. I read the first couple of chapters when considering it for grade three book club and decided not to have it as a book suggestion because I was worried it would get into uncomfortable issues around residential schools. However, now that I have finished it, I realize I'd be quite comfortable reading it with my class. I think if we don't do it for book club I might see if I could find a way to do it as a novel study. It seems to have enough of the issues but not get into sexual abuse. I really like her focus on wanting to learn to read. There are lots of good topics for discussion in this book.

Goodreads says:

The moving memoir of an Inuit girl who emerges from a residential school with her spirit intact.

Eight-year-old Margaret Pokiak has set her sights on learning to read, even though it means leaving her village in the high Arctic. Faced with unceasing pressure, her father finally agrees to let her make the five-day journey to attend school, but he warns Margaret of the terrors of residential schools.

At school Margaret soon encounters the Raven, a black-cloaked nun with a hooked nose and bony fingers that resemble claws. She immediately dislikes the strong-willed young Margaret. Intending to humiliate her, the heartless Raven gives gray stockings to all the girls -- all except Margaret, who gets red ones. In an instant Margaret is the laughingstock of the entire school.

In the face of such cruelty, Margaret refuses to be intimidated and bravely gets rid of the stockings. Although a sympathetic nun stands up for Margaret, in the end it is this brave young girl who gives the Raven a lesson in the power of human dignity.

Complemented by archival photos from Margaret Pokiak-Fenton's collection and striking artwork from Liz Amini-Holmes, this inspiring first-person account of a plucky girl's determination to confront her tormentor will linger with young readers.

IMWAYR

This is going to be a good reading week. I can feel it! This week I plan to re-read Crenshaw and find examples of signposts for book club. I also need to figure out what our next two books should be! Would love it if anyone has suggestions.

I'm working through these two books still (Once We Were Brothers and The Ripple Effect).

 

I'm listening to The Case Against Sugar on audio book and really loving it. I need to get started on 419 by Will Ferguson. It is our next book club book!

   

The Four Tendencies (Gretchen Rubin)

I'm really enjoying Gretchen Rubin's books. I'm starting to realize I don't have to fit in other people's pigeon holes. Learning more about myself and what works best for me is liberating! It also helps me understand relationships I have. I have close family who are definitely obligers. They do things and then complain about having to do them. I have never understood why they do things and then feel so put upon.....just don't do it! I understand now that they are obligers. I've learned that I'm an upholder/questioner. I especially appreciated her chapters about how to get along with different profiles of the tendencies. Brilliant read!

I would love a book on tendencies focused on children.


Goodreads says:
In this groundbreaking analysis of personality type, bestselling author of Better Than Before and The Happiness Project, Gretchen Rubin reveals the one simple question that will transform what you do at home, at work, and in life.

During her multibook investigation into understanding human nature, Gretchen Rubin realized that by asking the seemingly dry question "How do I respond to expectations?" we gain explosive self-knowledge. She discovered that based on their answer, people fit into Four Tendencies: Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, and Rebels. Our Tendency shapes every aspect of our behavior, so using this framework allows us to make better decisions, meet deadlines, suffer less stress, and engage more effectively.

More than 600,000 people have taken her online quiz, and managers, doctors, teachers, spouses, and parents already use the framework to help people make significant, lasting change.

The Four Tendencies hold practical answers if you've ever thought...

· People can rely on me, but I can't rely on myself.
· How can I help someone to follow good advice?
· People say I ask too many questions.
· How do I work with someone who refuses to do what I ask or who keeps telling me what to do?

With sharp insight, compelling research, and hilarious examples, The Four Tendencies will help you get happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative. It's far easier to succeed when you know what works for you. 

The Tree That Grew to the Moon (Eugenie Fernandes)

We have been talking a lot about genre in my class. This story is full of 'what if' conversations. It is a great exercise for kids to talk about all the crazy, good, bad things that could happen if something continues. The illustrations in this story are great and the kids in my class were quite captured by the conversation between the girl and her mom.

The author was born in New York but now lives in Ontario, so we'll claim her as Canadian. She also wrote Little Toby and the Big Hair, which, as someone with lots of hair, has always had a special place in my heart!


Goodreads says:

If Lena plants a baby tree in her bedroom, and sprinkles it with a little imagination, anything could happen. It might even grow to the moon!

IMWAYR

It's report card season and I'm so distracted!! I really just want to read - especially when I have report cards to write. However, I better get that done first. Then I'm ready for these!

I need to finish The Four Tendencies this week:


I'm listening to this one as an audio book. I love it!

Once We Were Brothers is in the, "would you just finish this book already???!!!" bin.


I've been dabbling in The Ripple Effect for a while and it's time to finish it:

Crenshaw (Katherine Applegate)

April 2016: Wow. This is an intense story. Poverty is hard on parents. I was especially struck with how hard it is on kids too. I had thought this would be a One School One Book choice. The topic certainly would be timely given our economy and the oil industry right now. However, just like Jacksons parents, my instinct is to not expose kids to sad stories of homelessness, hunger and other financial struggles. I am not sure I would read it with kids younger than grade three.

I think this would make a great novel study. I can imagine great discussions could come out of this story. We could even start a food drive for the food bank. Good character project!

I loved the cover for this book. Jackson has an imaginary friend who helps him through hard times. That seems right. 

Reread March 2018
Questions to bring up at book club:
- Why do you think Jackson's parents don't tell him everything about their troubles? Should parents tell their kids more?
Jackson wasn't honest with his friend about their situation. Wasn't he doing just what his parents were doing?
Have you ever had an imaginary friend?
How can imaginary friends help kids?
Why did the author choose a cat as an imaginary friend? Cats are often not that friendly. They don't mind being alone.
Was Crenshaw a typical cat? He really didnt like dogs....???what else?
Why did the author make him so silly? (He loved jelly beans, bubble baths, etc)

Goodreads summary:

In her first novel since winning the Newbery Medal, Katherine Applegate delivers an unforgettable and magical story about family, friendship, and resilience.

Jackson and his family have fallen on hard times. There's no more money for rent. And not much for food, either. His parents, his little sister, and their dog may have to live in their minivan. Again.

Crenshaw is a cat. He's large, he's outspoken, and he's imaginary. He has come back into Jackson's life to help him. But is an imaginary friend enough to save this family from losing everything?

Beloved author Katherine Applegate proves in unexpected ways that friends matter, whether real or imaginary.