At A Loss For Words (Carol Off)

 

I got to listen to Carol Off at Wordfest this past month. She is articulate and wise! This book was well-researched and very thorough.

Notes:

p. 11 Our inability to talk to each other isn't an accident; it's the objective of those who can only get what they want if they turn us into adversaries. It's a crucial first step in a transition toward anti-democratic and illiberal governments. Turning us against each other creates opportunities for demagoguery. 

p. 58 Charlie Kirk, founder of the well-funded, rabble-rousing non-profit group Turning Point USA, was quoted in the New York Times Magazine stating, "We don't have a democracy, okay? ...We're a republic." It seems lost on Kirk that the model for American republicanism comes from Ancient Rome, which was both a republic and a democracy until it became an empire with a dictator. Of perhaps that's what Kirk has in mind.

p. 74 Members of First Nations could vote but only if they became Canadian citizens, which they could do only if they revoked their status under the Indian Act. That act itself was (and is - it still exists) created with the intention of destroying the language, culture and history of people who had been on the continent for thousands of years. Only in the twenty-first century were the policies, including the residential school system, declared tools of cultural genocide, a designation determined by the Truth and Reconciliation Commission in a report released in 2025. 

p. 87 Thomas Homer-Dixon, a Canadian scholar who has studied violent conflict around the world for more than forty years, fears that the United States could be a right-wing autocracy by 2030 or even sooner. "The country is becoming increasingly ungovernable and some experts believe it could descend into civil war," he wrote in the Globe and Mail in early 2022. Homer-Dixon has played Cassandra before, and he's rather be proven wrong. But in his article, he also warned that Canada is woefully unprepared for such an eventuality. Authoritarian government in the United States is bad for the world, but especially for its northern neighbor.

p. 100 We're not born equal. Equality is acquired. To have equal access to political power, to legal representation and to opportunity is something that liberal democracies are supposed to provide to everyone. The word democracy is not failed by those who dismiss it to distort its meaning. It's failed by those of us who lack the imagination to see it as applying to more than just ourselves.

Goodreads says:

Award-winning author and broadcast journalist Carol Off digs deep into six words whose meanings have been distorted and weaponized in recent years—including democracy, freedom and truth—and asks whether we can reclaim their value.

As co-host of CBC Radio's As It Happens, Carol Off spent a decade and a half talking to people in the news five nights a week. On top of her stellar writing and reporting career, those 25,000 interviews have given her a unique vantage point on the crucial subject at the heart of her new book—how, in these polarizing years, words that used to define civil society and social justice are being put to work for a completely different political agenda. Or they are being bleached of their meaning as the values they represent are mocked and distorted. As Off writes, “If our language doesn’t have a means to express an idea, then the idea itself is gone—even the range of thought is diminished.” And, as she argues, that’s a dangerous loss.

In six, wide-ranging chapters, Off explores the mutating meanings and the changing political impact of her six chosen words—freedom, democracy, truth, woke, choice and taxes—unpacking the forces, from right and left, that have altered them beyond recognition. She also shows what happens when we lose our shared political we stop being able to hear each other, let alone speak with each other in meaningful ways. This means we stop being able to reckon with the complexity of the crises we face, leaving us prey to conspiracy theories, autocrats and the machinations of greed. At a Loss for Words is both an elegy and a call to arms.

Growing Home (Beth Ferry)

 

This was a great read from beginning to end - and it certainly went where I didn't expect it. It will make a great read-aloud. It would make a great book for adult Children's Lit readers too. Anyone who loves learning about words will love the banter about great words as well.

The characters are charming...who would expect a goldfish. some plants, a spider and bird to have a story to tell?! It felt a little bit like Mercy Watson - which is always charming. The humans were great characters too - Jillian, a little girl you just have to love because she loves everyone. Her occupied, but loving parents, a mysterious scientist and of course a greedy robber in the form of a auctioneer.

Goodreads says:
An unlikely team of talkative plants, a stowaway spider, and a grumpy goldfish use their newfound magical abilities to defend their family from a greedy human in this “utterly charming” (Booklist) middle grade novel from New York Times bestselling author Beth Ferry, with illustrations by the award-winning Fan brothers.

Ivy is the beloved houseplant of young Jillian Tupper of Number 3 Ramshorn Drive, much to the constant dismay of Toasty the goldfish, who is technically the family pet—swimming in his special place of honor, the antique octagonal fish tank—and should be the most loved. It seems that’s how the cookie (or cheese puffs, in Toasty’s case) crumbles in the eccentric Tupper household, but soon a sequence of thrilling and magical events challenges that way of life forever.

First, there’s the arrival of Arthur, a knowledgeable spider with a broken leg and an inquisitive mind, hidden in an old typewriter. Then Jillian throws everyone for a loop when she brings home dear, sweet Ollie, a school houseplant who just wants to be friends and sing. When Toasty splashes the plants with his tank water out of frustration, the friends learn that they can do magical things—like lift heavy objects and turn things invisible!

It turns out Toasty’s fishtank isn’t just for fish; it was made by a curious inventor who gave it special powers that, in the wrong hands, could disrupt everything forever. And a sinister man with purple shoes just so happens to want that tank at any cost. Can Ivy, Toasty, Arthur, and Ollie grow to be friends in time to work together to save their beloved Tupper family from utter ruin?

The Borrowers (Mary Norton)

 

This is a cute story. Ever wonder what all the creaks and groans are in the house when you're home alone? Maybe the Borrowers are in your house! 

This book was written in the 50s in England - so some of the writing is a little challenging for kids. It would be a good one to read aloud together so you could talk about the tricky words as they come up. 

Apparently, the author had poor eyesight because of an accident and was only able to see things up close. This is how she came up with the story. I love the idea of someone noticing the little things that are right under our nose that most people miss. 

It also hits on the idea of how sometimes the older folks are leery of things that younger people think is silly. 

We read this for our grade 3 book club. After we made our shrink art we used playdough to make miniature rooms that the Homily family might enjoy. 

There was a movie made years ago and just recently an animated version was made. I haven't watched either of them, but there is a lot of information and reviews about the movies online.

Background on the author's disability that led to writing this book.

Goodreads says:
Beneath the kitchen floor is the world of the Borrowers -- Pod and Homily Clock and their daughter, Arrietty. In their tiny home, matchboxes double as roomy dressers and postage stamps hang on the walls like paintings. Whatever the Clocks need they simply "borrow" from the "human beans" who live above them. It's a comfortable life, but boring if you're a kid. Only Pod is allowed to venture into the house above, because the danger of being seen by a human is too great. Borrowers who are seen by humans are never seen again. Yet Arrietty won't listen. There is a human boy up there, and Arrietty is desperate for a friend.

Braving the Wilderness (Brené Brown)

 

I really needed this. I read it in a day. This book completely flips how we look at cliques. She says that belonging isn't something we achieve with others. Instead, it is something we cultivate within ourselves. 

Fitting in is not the same as belonging. Fitting in is about assessing a group and changing who you are to be accepted by them. Belonging, however, requires you to be exactly who you are. There is no need to hustle for anyone's approval. If a tight-knit groups lacks the maturity to include you, you can just move on. 

She uses the wilderness as a metaphor for isolation, vulnerability and being on your own. She argues that standing alone, which can be terrifying, is where your true power lies. For me, the portable can seem like the wilderness but it is also a boundary of peace. The physical separation separates me from toxic energy and cliques.

She suggests three important approaches: having a strong back, soft front and wild heart. 

Strong back:

• key to navigating tough social landscapes
• set firm professional boundaries 

Soft front: 

• stay compassionate 
• don't let people's coldness turn you into a bitter person
• say your 60-second hello's, but do it for your integrity, not anyone else's response (or lack thereof)

Wild heart:  

• Hold fast to your "why" (a love of teaching and of students) which exists independent of any other social situations.

Goodreads says:
"True belonging doesn't require us to change who we are. It requires us to be who we are." Social scientist Brené Brown, PhD, LMSW, has sparked a global conversation about the experiences that bring meaning to our lives--experiences of courage, vulnerability, love, belonging, shame, and empathy. In Braving the Wilderness, Brown redefines what it means to truly belong in an age of increased polarization. With her trademark mix of research, storytelling, and honesty, Brown will again change the cultural conversation while mapping a clear path to true belonging.

Brown argues that we're experiencing a spiritual crisis of disconnection, and introduces four practices of true belonging that challenge everything we believe about ourselves and each other. She writes, "True belonging requires us to believe in and belong to ourselves so fully that we can find sacredness both in being a part of something and in standing alone when necessary. But in a culture that's rife with perfectionism and pleasing, and with the erosion of civility, it's easy to stay quiet, hide in our ideological bunkers, or fit in rather than show up as our true selves and brave the wilderness of uncertainty and criticism. But true belonging is not something we negotiate or accomplish with others; it's a daily practice that demands integrity and authenticity. It's a personal commitment that we carry in our hearts." Brown offers us the clarity and courage we need to find our way back to ourselves and to each other. And that path cuts right through the wilderness. Brown writes, "The wilderness is an untamed, unpredictable place of solitude and searching. It is a place as dangerous as it is breathtaking, a place as sought after as it is feared. But it turns out to be the place of true belonging, and it's the bravest and most sacred place you will ever stand."

Big Time (Laura Vanderkam)

 

I've always believed we could all do a little more if only we were a little more organize - and this book helped justify my thinking! She really celebrates the idea of dreaming big and planning small - what can you do every day to get you to your goal? 

I've read other books by this author. I agree with her approach to use of time.

Notes:

On what is the minimum you can do or can accept as enough, every day:   
p. 69  When the project itself is massive, sometimes the temptation is not to accept this ease and to feel like you should do more. 

Please, resist this temptation. When you race ahead, unless you can actually see the finish line, the pace stops being sustainable. Plus, if you get ahead, you might be tempted to start skipping days, and then you can lose momentum. Better to keep going with just a little more than nothing, knowing that the difference between nothing adn a little more than nothing is cumulatively great. 

p. 144 Charlie Brown says, "Some day, we will all die, Snoopy!" The dog replies, "True, but on all the other days, we will not." ....so let's get going and do something.

She really encourages you to keep a time log so you can figure out how you're spending your time, then ask yourself:

p. 173 What do you like most about your schedule?
Look at the major categories of how you spend your time.
Do these numbers reflect how you'd like to spend your time?
What do you think realistic, ideal week would look like?
What would you like next week to look like? 

p. 179 Tactic 2: How to run a weekly planning session

1. Choose a regular planning time

2. Look at the landscape? What do you have going on next week?

3. Make yourself a priority list for the upcoming week.

4. Look at everything else (obligations, expectations, logistics, of who needs to go where, etc.)

5. Make sure you have something you are looking forward to.

p. 182 Build a better workday.

Spend time doing the things you like to do most

Spend 15 minutes deepening a work friendship

Take two intentional breaks each day

Goodreads says:

A beloved productivity expert’s mind-opening and schedule-expanding guide to making the most of every hour.

Most of us have an adversarial relationship with time. We’re constantly trying to beat the clock―behavior rooted in a fear that time is scarce and must be obsessed over, hoarded, and ultraoptimized. But what if there is a different way to view time, one that could make our hours feel abundant? What if we believed that we had enough time to advance our careers, enjoy meaningful relationships, pursue hobbies, and more? In Big Time, time management expert Laura Vanderkam shows us how to make this our reality.

Drawing on original research about how hundreds of real people spend their time and her own experience of tracking her time for a decade, Vanderkam shows how even busy people can come to feel that time is abundant. Big Time offers simple, tested tactics with high impact, such as developing a “ringmaster” mindset; breaking big goals into daily, bite-sized pieces; and making little bets within a schedule to increase the odds of a breakthrough. Through actionable advice for managing a complex life, Vanderkam demonstrates how we can feel liberated by the time we have, instead of restrained by it.

By turns surprising, thought-provoking, and encouraging, Big Time shows readers that the daily experience of time can be quite spacious―and that, managed well, each day’s hours can be a source of happiness and satisfaction.

Unoffendable (Brant Hansen)

 

I might listen to this on repeat. I was recommended by a PFS person I follow and she was right. It's so good!! The concepts he covers are a perfect approach to life. The audio is especially good. He doesn't sound like he's reading - just talking. 

Goodreads says:

It turns out giving up your “right” to be offended can be one of the most freeing, healthy, simplifying, relaxing, refreshing, stress-relieving, encouraging things you can do. It’s a radical, provocative We’re not entitled to get offended or stay angry. The idea of our own “righteous anger” is a myth. It is the number one problem in our societies today and, as Dallas Willard says, Christians have not been taught out of it. But what if Christians were the most unoffendable people on the planet? In Unoffendable you will find concrete, practical ways to live life with less stress, In a humorous and conversational style, Unoffendable seeks to lift religious burdens from our backs and allow us to experience the joy of gratitude, perhaps for the first time, every single day of our lives—flourishing the way God intended.

The Haunting of Hill House (Shirley Jackson)

 

If it wasn't for book club, I never would have read this. Many reviews I read said it was the scariest of all books....but I didn't find it really scary. It really meandered. The plot finally started to move in the last 25 pages. All the people were kind of dull and definitely lonely...and crazy. It was published in 1959 and has that rambling, excessively wordy feeling of classic books. Meh.

I'm glad I ventured into a new genre, but I can't say I really loved it.

Goodreads says:

“Hill House, not sane, stood by itself against its hills, holding darkness within. . . .”

Four seekers have arrived at the rambling old pile known as Hill House: Dr. Montague, an occult scholar looking for solid evidence of psychic phenomena; Theodora, his lovely and lighthearted assistant; Luke, the adventurous future inheritor of the estate; and Eleanor, a friendless, fragile young woman with a dark past. As they begin to cope with chilling, even horrifying occurrences beyond their control or understanding, they cannot possibly know what lies ahead. For Hill House is gathering its powers—and soon it will choose one of them to make its own.